Helpful, unhelpful loved ones and friends

Spiritual Healing On Every Level

Helpful, unhelpful loved ones and friends


Something I had become naively blind to for a while and just recently started back adding into my protection work… protection from the “helpful, unhelpfulness” of loved ones and friends.

I do believe that most often our friends, family, spouse, loved ones, etc… want us to be ok.

However often, sadly,

they think they know what’s best for us.

Even if it goes against what we specifically want or ask for.

They assume their prayers, thoughts and helpfulness is what we need. Even if it flies directly in opposition of our stated or privately prayed desires.

And everything is energy. I don’t believe another can overpower our energetic individual will if we aren’t in some way giving consent.

However when we let chinks happen in our spiritual, emotional and or energetic armor, we  weaken our ability to block out their bullshit. The more we let in their negativity, stress, fear, anxiety, disbelief, judgments, etc… the easier it is for their “helpful, unhelpfulness” to wreak havoc.

It’s like a friend reaching for your french fries to help you hold them, yet knocking them out of your hands because they are clumsy AND you didnt even ask them to help you.

Unhelpful friends

Helpful, unhelpful friends and loved ones

Now listen, I’m not by any means blaming them, because again, most of them call themselves being helpful.

However recently my angelic team brought it to my attention that I was slipping majorly and allowing some detriment to happen because I had let my regular habit of blocking out all that extra stuff, slide… I mean bigtime. And I was pissed, at everything and everyone because it has caused some major turmoil.

I was REALLY pissed!!!! LOL!

I had been trying to isolate what it was that was going on and causing some of the discord, and boom!!! Yup, they got straight up in my face and and said look at this… and showed me what I needed to address. I had gotten lax with my specific protection work on keeping the energy of my loved ones out of my space, manifestation work, goals, etc… For me its necessary because most simply don’t understand what it is that I do.

So their helpful suggestions are not so helpful.

They don’t understand my goals, so their dreams look different than mine. And if I’m not careful I can find myself shifting and taking the path of least resistance and oftentimes agreeing to something or doing something different than what it is I truly need or desire.

So PROTECTION is part of my regular SELF-CARE.

It is part of what keeps me balanced. And also keeps me emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually and financially well. Because I’ve learned in life, most times the enemy isn’t a big bad wolf lurking in the shadows. Though yes there’s truly a lot to beware of out here in these spiritual streets. Most times it’s our own self that sabotages from within. Or those closest to us that get under our skin and under our radar because we love them.

So take a look at everything and everyone around you, including YOU. Anything or anyone you notice creating some not so helpful things or situations? Can you forgive yourself? Can you forgive them? I ain’t saying you have to forgive them, lol, but it might help, you never know.

So I ask you this question…
Where do you need to rev up and strengthen your protection and boundaries?

The next thing you have to be mindful of, is how or where might you be doing this to someone else? Trying to be helpful and yet wreaking havoc? Dont get it twisted and think you’re not doing it, we all do it at some point or another. Inserting our opinion when no one asked. Asking questions from our perfect perch in judgement because we think we know someone.

Those oh so helpful (not!) suggestions that only cause confusion and make the person 2nd guess themselves. Yup, we’re all guilty.

So, are you ready and willing to look more closely at yourself? I know I have been. When i realized how much trauma it was causing me when I looked at all the ways it was showing up around me from others, I decided to be even more intentional in my words and support. I already ask my friends and loved ones what they need from me? How can I best support them? What is it specifically they want to accomplish? And now, even with all of that, I check in with myself to make sure I’m not unintentionally adding in any doubts or fears because of any judgements I have.

It’s honestly not that hard and it only takes an extra second or two, here and there. What’s helpful to you and what’s not?

And I truly believe it helps me to be a better friend. It also allows me to more quickly recognize now when they are inserting something into my space of energy, that is going against what I want or causing distraction or disturbance. I more quickly shut those conversations down and reaffirm my boundaries. Powerful! And necessary!


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